summer has gone

School has started.
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My daughter is in the third grade, my son is in the seventh. He now starts in a yet another school. After our attempts to get him into a church-based school failed (reason: we, as a family do not attend services of any church. See? it's not your stand, but your reputation that counts. too bad for pagans like us, heh.) So I opted to remove him from his class, that did him no good at all. His classmates were underachieving and/or undergifted and/or disabled and/or of bad background. The level of education, for various purposed was extremely low and my son adopted himself to that low level. Which means he did not develope quite well.

This new school is an average state school, but his class is having extra singing lessons. I don't think *that* could be that bad.... There are 17 pupils in his class, and only 4 of them are boys. A much smoother atmosphere I guess. No more agressive behaviour from overaged mates I trust.

We'll just see.

My son has two more years in elementary education and at the age of 14 he'll be directed to a secondary school. Perhaps we'll head for the one state secondary school I wanted to avoid in my thoughs about his future this spring. But times are changing - and so are my thoughts. I want him a peaceful and strong community where he can boost up his abilities to his maximum.

Here they are, after the opening ceremony, still wearing their nice clothes.

Some photos of our summer menu:

the first one is a picture of an evening meal. bread slices are covered in egg and then are fried in oil. as a side dish, slices of eggplant are sauteéd and a ligth vegetable salad is there to balance off the juicy fat of the other two components of the meal.

this one here's a lunch. roasted chicken with sauteéd potatoes. and guess what, some salad. I love summer salads - they are so easy to make, so delicious... with a pinch of fresh hot pepper, there's a tint of spicyness to them just to tease the mouth.

this one's a cake, with apricots on top.

oh, what, another salad, yes.

summer offered lots of fruits and yes, we did take care of them - so that we don't have to worry about having a taste of summer in the winter :)

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and yes, the fourth anniversary of blogging has peacefully gone. I would like to express my thanks for all your heartfelt comments and good wishes I recieved during these four years. There were times when a simple 'I hear you - no matter how far away you practically are' meant half the world to me....

there were times I hope when my simple words were able to contribute to someone's faith in the ultimate good will and turn of events.

Even if my English sometimes has some hiccups - I'm sorry for that.

I learned a lot from you. and I do not confine to the language at all.

I will keep on blogging and continue to use the potential of this surface to connect people and keep those precious friendships and/or relationships I have been given over the past four years.

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with a view to another four years - God bless you all,

your crazy and indefinite tree...

does my reflection trouble me?

anyway, it's been a long time since I last posted any music on my blog.
keeping the upcoming 4th anniversary of this place in my mind, here I go with one piece I like to listen to these days -

if you can't see a thing, click here to enjoy Same Mistake by James Blunt.

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as I was unable to make YouTube embeddings work on my blog, here's another link to a much more complex and enjoyable version of the very same song, by the very same singer...Same Mistake... again.

oops: HERE

the Moon rested on his shoulders

He had a star held
in his left hand
with white trails of pillows behind

He heard the pumpkin growing
inch by inch
waiting patiently
for another turn of the sky

He smelled
the Earth gently puffing out
today's sudden rain
like it was the downpour of some desparate child
left alone among the crazed crowd of anger
and silence
kills it all

He kissed the star
and let it glow
alone

and the Moon rested on his shoulders

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the four meme

Here's another meme I saw at Aine's.

It is called 'the four meme' - and just above her take on the blogosphere's contagious fun (a.k.a. meme) she's pondering about the importance of the number four for her and for mankind in general.

For me, the number five always seemed more attractive for some reason I can not name.

Number five makes me think of the four elements (earth, fire, wind and water) plus the spirit. There are five fingers on each of our hands and legs.

But now back to the meme ->

The compilation below reflects my attitude towards the worlds as of today - it's not a general picture of me, but rather a quick sample of my present state.

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Four Movies You Can See Over and Over

Lord of the Rings

S.Darko

The Butterfly Effect

Macskafogó (a Hungarian animated movie)

Four Places You Have Lived

the town I was born in, plus the one I've been living in since 1995

-now that's only two

Four TV Shows You Love(d) to Watch

no tv at the moment

Four Places You Have Been on a Vacation - (in cronological order)

Bulgaria, seaside

Prague

USA

The Netherlands

Four of your favorite foods

dark chocolate (I do love the 100% version)

hot herb tea

radicchio

beef

Four Websites You Visit Daily

Google (does it count?)

YouTube

a Hungarian version of an MMORPG site (y'all, I'm an addict)

my blog and your blog, too

Four Places You Would Rather Be

The High Tatras

canoeing on River Tisza

Mongolia

anywhere where's the weather is anything but bloody hot like right here and now

Four Things You Hope to Do Before You Die

Visit Tibet and/or Mongolia

Go skydiving

Hear that some of my writing(s) helped someone in some way in his/her journey to a more complex and balanced life

See my kids (grandkids) lead a happy life

Four Novels/Books You Wish You Were Reading for the First Time

(I guess this is for books that had the greatest impact of any kind on my life...a tough question)

Hundred years of solitude by G.G.Marquez

Oryx and Crake by M. Atwood

Poems of József Attila (an acknowledged Hungarian poet of the early XX. century)

Birdy by W. Wharton

a new wall

Reconstruction mode [ON]

This photo below depicts the installation of a fresh-new door between the old kitchen (going to be a bedroom for the parents) and the other parts of the house. By separating a bedroom a relatively narrow corridor is also created, but there are downsides to every coin.

We had two friends helping here.

Later on the same day. The wall is higher.

Outside, it's much more peaceful in the garden.

wine, good reading and chicken

Jason's having another writing contest. Check out all the fine entries HERE. the contest is open until 15 July.

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(I'm out of practice these times and don't really feel like entering. It's just not my time these days, no, definitely not...)

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This summer we only had two hatchings so far. I have already posted photos of the first litter, and these here are of the second one. Congratulations to Hajas (pronounce as huh-yush), who, despite her mature age (she's bordering 4 years, I guess, but that's just a guess..) managed to hatch 11 and raise 10 babies. These two photos were made in June 23 by my son, who found interest in recording his favourite hen.

The photos below were made on July 8 by me. Hens guarding youngsters are always allowed to have their way in the garden, while every other chicken are kept in a closed yard.

This summer we had lots of rain. This shows. Just have a look at our vegetable garden. In some of the rows there are the second sowings of salads and peas.

exposed again...

oh, what did I just do a few days ago...

I entered a room where a chorus held its normal Saturday rehearsal.

I said hello and told them I liked to sing. And also that I would like to sing in a community.

Oh and yes the chorister said allright no matter you were unable to read the notes, it's your voice that's important.

Oh yes and I am to be auditioned this Friday evening.

Keep your fingers crossed.

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Anyway...

If any of you think this crazy tree has just gone way too crazy these days, no thanks I am all right. On the plus side: I always loved singing. My range varies with my state of health, my ear is fine. I think singing with lots of people together is a fantastic experience.

On the negative side howevere, there's the lack of musical training, the lack of vocal strength in certain ranges, and many more I can't even possibly think of.

I was open about not being able to read the notes and not having any experience in singing in a chorus at all.

The chorister was positive.

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Baby chicken, yes we have 10 more. Photos are coming soon.

whew

My first ever public appearance as a writer of poems and/or short stories has gone fine. As I mentioned in my other blog, I have joined a writers' club early this spring. We meet every month, learn things, solve problems, do homeworks, and so on. I find it extremely useful in having my creativity flowing.

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Yesterday we had an evening in the local library where everyone read her/his own poems/writings for a maximum of 8 minutes.

There were us, the leader of the group and attendants of the library and some yes, some other people, too. The evening was part of the events organized around the 80th National Week of Books.

I read three of my poems.

I was excited, talked about being excited to relax myself, took a deep breath, and began to read. Oh, my.

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The first poem was a short one about the ever-presence and continuity of water, the second was rather a pagan song to welcome the spring season, but the third one... that one was a tough one. Being therapeutic, as most of my writings are, it is a very personal poem.

Well, I survived.

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a Hungarian wedding

On May 16 we attended a wedding of a middle-aged baranta teacher. His pupils wore the red+white+black dress they use for trainings and shows. It was surely a sign of respect. Most of the people invited also showed up in one of their most traditional clothings. This is how we went from the meeting place to the church.

Inside the church.
Outside, the ceremony is over.

A herb garden that represents the area of Hungary.

Two scourges at a time. They both hit and crack!

Scourges were used not only to guide animals, but also as a source of exercise.

'I'm gonna show you baby that a woman can be tough'...

Two short sticks against one long stick. It is quite tricky to manage the long one, but you can slide it from one side to another, and surprise the attacker from a hit from an unexpected angle.

Two short sticks against one another. It is not unusual to fight in a lying position. Well, in an attack you just do what you must I guess ...

A curved Hungarian sword against a war-axe.

A pheasants could just as well use his scythe to fight with - the blade is dismounted from it's normal position so that a long object that resembles a sword is created.

A Chinadish is broken by the couple. The number of pieces are counted. If there are only a few pieces, say, 2-15 the guests chants something that means that the number of broken pieces represents the number of kids the couple is going to have together. If the china is broken into a 'hundred pieces' - the guests cry out that the couple is going to have quite a number of years together. Either way, it's a win-win situation...

An bowman on the horse, shooting fixed targets.

Paprika stew in in the making.

A cereal meat (spiced up with herbs and some veggies) is being prepared for the vegetarian guests.

Meat being prepared for serving. Note the traditional hat worn by one of the cooks.

The showman (?) delivers and presents the courses of the dinner with a small set of funny poems. The bride and the groom are now sitting at the main table (not seen in the photo).

A traditional meat-soup to start with:

My husband and our daughter having a helping from the second dish. It was a paprika stew made from sheep.

An apple pie, served at the end of the meal.

Love and Hate - facts

As I get older, the number of things I hate decreases. I focus on understanding instead.
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This is what I had in mind when I answered Jason's call on his Fun Friday.
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I have just finished watching 'The Curious Case of Benjamin Button'. I loved how many great insights it contained. I hated how selfish the main female character was. Yet, her behaviour at the time rang true. I loved the film.

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I like being loved - although there are times when I deny my need to feel so.

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Recently, I've met someone online. Blah, the usual story some of you might say.
No, not for me.

He's special, well at least, he is for me.

He is half my age.

Oh my, I did not know I was going to write a confession.

Do not read any further if this subject bothers you.

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These are my thoughts. For any help to anyone who's in need. And yes, I have my husband who knows every detail and loves me all the same. He, my man is just the finest ever available. Okay, back to the other man.... ;)

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He's just a silly boy who likes my virtual company. There are many things in life over which we disagree, yet I have learned so many things from him.

Like other fellow virtual friends, talking with him taught me that the lack of similar education and background does not exclude anyone from finding friendship with another. Being friendly and sensitive towards the needs and suffer of the other has nothing to do with being similar.

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When I was a teenager, I was alone. I had like one or two friends and that was all.

I was always the one people for some reason or another rejected.

Now, I see that the main reason was ... me.

(off...David, or Steve - was it rather *I*? ... on again...)

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These days I have been given the opportunity to seek, find friends, to loose them, to fight for a friendship, to work on a friendship...

I am so thankful for these people.

Even for those who hurt me.

I sometimes think my life was incomplete somehow. Now it's not.

I found friends, kept some, lost some...

The trivial things of one's life.

So trivial everyone experinces between the ages of 10-20 and so on...

Everyone but me.

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Recently this fellow and I had a quarrel.

The fight lasted a bit more than a day, it resulted in some (thousands of) teardrops, two letters, one sent and one withheld; and for him, some terrible feeling of weariness.

Now, a few confessions and some more tears later, we are fine.

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I am inclined to think that the main reason behind our fight was the lack of self-confidence.

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The lack of self confidence on my part, resulted in clinging to my stance even when being stubborn risked this beautiful friendship. I thought that by sticking to my ideas I can keep myself for myself. And by doing so, I justify my existence. I feared that giving up any of my standing would have resulted in loosing my self-esteem. I was absurd and stubborn in holding fast to my opinion. It was out of control and, well, he was out of his mind.

His lack of self esteem however, resulted in refusing to accept a friendship. As far as I can tell he thought that he was not worth any kind attention and true friendship so...whenever he feels a true friendship is on the way towards him he does everything to ruin the relationship so that he can say himself: 'See, I'm not worth it. I am not good enough to have friends."

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These are my findings of yesterday. I wrote them here today, perhaps...

I thought I would share my insights with you.

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Just today, as I was collecting chamomile flowers, I was thinking about giving it all up and starting a farm somewhere.

I would just grow herbs and raise some chicken.

Picking chamomile is one of the fines thing one can ever possibly do.

The plant is upright, the leaves are soft. The plants are pale to bright green and their top is full of blossoms. The more you pick the more they grow. I dry them in the attic until they are ready to get boxed for the winter.

Picking those white flowers with their yellow center is one of the few things that gets you close to God.

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I consider the idea of of buying some land where I would be growing herbs.

Bordering the age of 40, I finally see this as one possible good way of living.

Am I in my right mind?

Am I confused?

Don't be afraid: I certainly would not do anything silly.

I just don't want to wait for any better, when something's good enough.

Is it the panic that stems from the fear of getting old?

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I just think I have to ponder about this a little while.

Thanks for bearing with me.

Any advice (grammar or life...) is welcomed.

Be careful with me, I'm fragile.

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Cheers,
your faithful, indecisive, indefinite and crazy tree.

a strange egg

Dear me, what was this hen thinking ?

Note the egg on the upper right.

This container shows yesterday's produce. Our hens are of various size, type and plumage - that explains the variety of shape, size and color of eggs.

But *that* one is way different. The shape is not oval to begin with. It rather looks like a large rectangular stone. There is a spiral line at the tip of the egg that seems to incise the shell.

Our bathroom

the one and only...

Spring photos

One of our hens decided to collect her eggs. Instead of laying them where the other hens do, that is, in a small wooden box specially made for the purpose, this particular one reached higher. Every day she flew up to the top of the chicken house and laid her eggs among the hay we collected last summer. For two weeks, every day she spent some half an hour laying the egg and returned to normal life again. After that she finished laying and stayed on the eggs. This she did for 21 days. Every day she left her unborn for a couple of minutes she spared for feeding and drinking. Each time she returned to the nest. And voilá - on May 1, there she was with 5 chicken. She is the mother of all, but there were three fathers.

Among the five babies, there are three yellow ones. These will turn white as they grow old. The two black babies will turn barred. Enjoy the pictures of our garden.

bay-beeeeeeeee

Yes, finally.

She was induced (word usage, anyone?) but today around noon my husband's sister finally finished her marathon with this sixth baby of hers.

Congratulations to Nóri, who (by now) has given life to 4 girls, aged 16,9,8 and2 and 2 boys, aged 14 and ... 0.01 :)

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The rest of this post needed rewriting and re-structuring so it was removed instead. No offence taken, but when the ratio of mistakes and clumsy expressions exceeds those that are understandable and acceptable ... one just has to push delete and review one's intentions. I've been neglecting English for a while and it shows. I'll try harder next time.

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writing ?

These days I'll sure have to finish...hm, wait, I'll sure have to start writing an article for an eco-conscious online magazine.
Any trouble with that?
Well, yes and no.
I have no trouble digging into eco-consciousness, or any form of traditonal agriculture for that matter. I dig them both - lame pun, perhaps.
I have no trouble writing.... ? Hm...let me see...provided there's an inspiration and motivation, writing is fun for me.
I have no trouble writing for the public.... ?
Well, I have this blog for 4 ? 5 ? years ?
Have been writing articles for paper and online magazines and other online surfaces in the past six years? Really, that's not the point.
The point of fear, no, F.E.A.R. is that this time I am required to make an interview with someone through the telephone.
Phew, there you have it, I named you, my little bastard.
I'm nearly 40 and am afraid of making that particular phone call.
I'm truly broken.
I got this task like two weeks ago.
Right after having gotten it I got two others, of different kinds. One was a translation (from Hun to Eng) and the second one was two articles (no interview needed at all).
Guess what I did first?
The translation, because that's my favourite.
Than I wrote the two articles (one on seasonal veggies, one on recipes) for the very same online magazine I should be writing that interview-based essay as well. Go figure. The same authority, the same readers' range, the same style and approach needed.
It's the phone interview I fear.
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no baby news :s

For those who've been following me in the past two weeks, it is obvious, but for the newcomers, may there be any to my blog: it is my husband's sister who is pregnant with her sixth child.

Aged a bit over forty, she is now two weeks overdue with his new baby boy.

We are all into natural ways, you know. We don't rush into the doctor's office very often, we don't much on tablets :)

Hmmm, let's see, the last time I was in GP's office was when something got into my right eye and needed a removal, and this event was like 4 years ago....

But now we are worried. This delay has become a bit of a stress on the family by now.

I hope everything turns out well at the end.

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it's not *that* post

No baby news, no writers' circle post, either.

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My husband's sister visited us this Sunday - just exactly when she was one week overdue.

Tasks (homeworks) we've been given in the writers' group are making my creative juices flowing, so as to say. Also I came to realize that the thing I've been working on lately is missing some vital elements. Perhaps those were the reasons for my not being able to go on with the writing.

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Re: the online game I used to play

I'm still in it and I'm planning to go on with it.

It works like an anti-depressant for me.

I'll have to reconsider my quitting, but also the way and depth I'm involved with it. And also the time I spend with it.

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And that was all for today as my mind is occupied now - I've been out of work for quite a time and now translation and writing articles are hard on me. I'm sorry for the lack of real posts.
I hope to be back soon.

the inevitable

Dear all,
so far - no baby news.
It also turned out that the idea of 'kids living in our house' was a mere game my husband played on me to fool me on 1 April.
Pfft.
He knows how much incompetent I feel in situations where kids are involved - please note he does not say or think I am incompetent, but is aware of my fear of being with kids. He thinks I am not so bad with kids after all, it's only that I am lazy and a bit selfish and I prefer the convenience of being alone to being with kids, that's all. Whew. I'm not sure the whole internet was interested in such secrets about me. Well, that's just how I am...
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We have made a decision re: my son's homeschooling. Kind of. We'll try to get him into the same school next year and if he fails again, we opt for the non-religious high school that is available in town. That school is famous for its outstanding results in Math and English and those subjects are my son's best fields. As for the lack of spirituality - I think we can make up for it at home quite well.
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Garden news.
Spring!
Carrots and garden peas are out now and the salads have at least two leaves :)))
No photos, unfortunately.

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Community news.
The women's asscoiation I tried to quit and where I, for the sake of a good company, finally stayed organized a Farewell Winter - Welcome Spring Party this Thursday.
A costume party, as it was...whoa.
I dressed up as a Druidess, with flowers in my hair.
My hair is black (by Nature), with occasional greys here and there and is slightly curly when I make a bun of it after having it washed. I usually keep the bun, for this is the only way my hair does not get into my everyday activities, but I just let the mane go freely this time.
I wore a linen dress, but that was covered by white sheets from both the front and the back, so as to pretend I was wearing a toga.
A Druidess would normally go barefoot, so I had no socks on and was wearing light brown textile slippers.
I spent the first half of the evening in the costume but found it extremely difficult to do the barbecue.
So I switched to a security guard, with boots, durable pants, a camouflage tshirt. Tucked in my pants I wore a plastic gun, a mobile phone and I had a sort of a headset on to imitate remote-communication. I wore my hair in the usual bun at the back of my head.
I disappeared as a feminine figure, while everyone was sitting beside the fire and returned, marching in my boots and eyeing the group as a female, but quite masculine guard. I played with the headset and informed my imaginary fellow guardsmen by saying: 'I'm approaching the group. They do not seem dangerous.'
This little game I played evoked some laughter among my friends.
I enjoy playing roles very much. I think somewhere deep inside there's an actor hidden, within me. It's not an actor with much talent, but with quite a load of eagerness.
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And finally, we are on the renovations of our house again. My husband has some days off during Eastern Holidays. There are still many things to do.
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Have a Happy Holiday!
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Next time it'll be either baby news, or my report on the second meeting of the Writers' Club, which was held on 6 April, or both.
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Cheers,
SzF.

about

Dear all,
my sister-in-law (my husband's sister) is having her 6th kid these days. It's a great news, especially after the things she and her family have gone through, so I am delighted to see their new family expanding.
This also means that I am to house up three of her kids, the youngest ones, aged 9, 8 and 2. I'm unsure about my ability to check your site, or my, for that matter... and also, about my ability to handle the situation in general. I'm not very good with kids, you know, the two I have gives me enough job and challenge, but now I'll be having 5! - one of them not yet 2 years of age.
- - -
Other not-so-great news is that my son was refused from the high school we tried to get into.
We have the following options:
1. try to get into said school a year later
2. stay in the school he's now in
3. search for a new school
We are going for for option #1.
If you followed my previous thoughts on the state of that school, you understand why option #2 is outruled.
If you knew my son as much as we do, you'd see why option #3 also is out of the question.
It means that he will be homeschooled for as long as he gets into a secondary school.
...
This month April is set to find a great solution to this problem we face. We also have to find the reason for rejection. Aspiring kids had to write a test paper on Math and Hungarian (you know, the type of subject you have as English - it's both about grammar and literature).
Out of 50, he scored 46 in Math, which is a nice result.
His Hungarian was 37/50, which is... not so much. I was kind of shocked to see how low his Hungarian score was.
Well, beside these scores, the results of former years also are important. The final score is counted upon using the results of the two previous semesters. These points were quite good.
Also, since this is a Church-based school, the way he takes part in the Community also matters.
And this is where we absolutely fail.
We do not attend services, nor do we take part in any activities organized by the Reformist Church.
Prior to his writing tests, this school has a talk with the parents about the way they see the world, about their ideas about the school. I think we (my husband and I) passed this successfully and trust me, we did not lie to get a good impression.
We have our faith and are trying to raise our children to make them a useful and intelligent part of the society. We acknowledge the rule of a tough school in the right handling of the youth. We believe in setting a good example and having a fair but strict hand. This is what normally what we believe about upbringing a child. Teaching and keeping traditions and working hard to succeed - we have no problems with that.
It is the Sunday school and the community events we are not able to attend - the reasons?
It is on Sunday and we organize our life so as to have a family gathering each Sunday. Cousins and relatives often come and join us in our semi-country house. We have a meal and generally, we just spend time together.
Also, to get into town to attend the Sunday school (and the church service) would take considerable time. Time away from being home, being together and alone with our family. We are living far from where the Church is and we have no car.
Also, being pagans, we don't see the importance of being in one special building to get into contact with the Higher Being. Of having one special gathering for the purpose of serving one another and God. Of the importance of one special book in finding our way.
See?
We are not Christians.
We have not told this particular bit about our faith to the school. Had they directly asked we would have surely told them it all.
But there are so many misunderstandings we wanted to avoid.
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We chose this particular school because we are sure this is the best possible one in town. There are four high schools in our town. Going to another town was out of the question (remember we do not own a car).
One school is Catholic. There's no way we can get into that one. The rules are even stricter over there. One belongs to the Reformed Church (the one we tried to get into). The third is a state school, with quite a good reputation for its results in Math and English (yes, English) - but there's no background of Hungarian traditions and spirituality at all there. It is strictly based on materialism, as we've heard. This is somehow repels us. The fourth is a Rudolf Steiner-based Waldorf school, the one my son was rejected from at the age of 10. We do not wish to re-enter that school by any means.
So, this is where we are...holding our heads, looking for directions...
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I wish I could tell you some more good news, my dear. Spring is here, tulips are out.
Cheers,
SzF.

Bravery

A friend of mine asked me a favour to translate a poem written in Hungarian by one of her friends. I do not usually translate poems, apart from those I write - this request found me by surprise.

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The title is Bravery - as is my action. Your comments are welcomed.
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Bravery

Definitions are lost.
My love, this is where we are -
Nothingness.
Poles and meat hooks.
Frozen kids emerging from stained loops.

To my table, you are invited,
see - I have no manners.
My head is turned
away with the shrubs upon your plate
no one is supposed to
order.

Come, come into the woods,
let the rain wash us through the dirt
A stillness waits where
hedgehogs rush
from swamps -
and no questions are needed

Pick any day - March 3rd

Awakening.
Chicken.
Corn.
Bed.
Kitchen.
Breakfast.
Quarrel.
School.
Discussion.
Notes.
Plans.
Pen.
Writing.
Music.
Exercise.
Tiredness.
Slaughterpants.
Garden.
Chase.
Axe.
Neck.
Feather.
Skin.
Intestines.
Meat.
Lunch.
Boy.
Girl.
Games.
Joy.
Home.
Table-tennis.
Tiredness.
Laughter.
Dinner.
*********
For explanation SEE.

a writing contest at 6S

I'm a fairly regular reader of the six-sentences page. For those not familiar with the site, all pieces contain six sentences: not much, not less, but six. As far as I gathered, contributors vary from acknowledged authors to basically anyone interested in adding his/her own six.
Every once in a while they have a contest anyone can enter.
This time the task is to finish a piece that already contains five sentences.
It is available HERE - your have to watch the video, where the first five sentences are written and then you can complete the piece by adding your sixth sentence in the commenting section. All the entries are up and their number keeps increasing at an alarming rate.
Some of them are brilliant, some fun, some are really thought provoking.
I prefer the ones that keep the style of the original sentences.
Have a nice reading!

between two computers

There is a Hungarian proverb that literally refers to one having to sit on the ground between two seats. It actually means that one has two opportunities but is unable to take either so must live through the situation without any of them.
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We used to have two computers in our small room, office if you will.
Need I say more?
One of them is broken (aka blue death). The service said it was the ventillator but it turned out the whatever-it's-called-an important-whatever is also broken. We have to wait until someone offers one of his whatever for sale so the shop can fix that something into our PC.
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The second one had no email, internet access, DVD-player, sound on it. I started to install these accessories, when it turned out that the whole system needs reinstalling.
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I'm typing this from the computer as it is up and running, but as for tomorrow...?
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I also wrote a post about first writers' meeting on my other blog, like anyone cares...Well, I do, as this is an important step in my publicly admitting the importance of writing in my life. We were given quite a load of homework!
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Also, I do not feel very well.
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Cheers,
SzF.

a simultaneous post

my home computer is broken but will be up and ready within a few days.

Surprisingly enough, I seem to enjoy the peace the lack of internet means in our home.
In the meantime, let me draw your attention towards my other blog called The Copper Moon Project, which is about writing only. I set that one up to monitor my way towards finishing a short piece of writing of the same name, needless to say only to interrupt it when the online game got me.
That was about the time when I started writing Halo, so my attention is turned towards that project instead.
Some of you are familiar with this blog, some with the other one, but there should not be such a separation.
That other one is about writing, in particular and in general, while this one is basically about anything I face. Whenever I have anything to publish is getting published here. Poems, writings, photos and musings about everyday...it's all here, while all topics more related to writing are over there.
Thanks for your attention.

Snow covers it

Snow covers it

Memories of us -
Clapping with one hand only
Never having given yourself all
You had me

My yearning's a tree that bears no fruit
Yet I cherish and return for the sake of
Your being and your spirit
It was not really you
...were you?

I gave myself all
And snow covers it
Silence entombing like
An empty pot, left broken, to the will of the winds

Snow covers my tears
And the memories of us

The what?

The photo was made in The Netherlands October 2008. I was visiting a windmill in one of the small cities in the country. I climbed up to see what's there is to see within a windmill in work, when I came accross this sight. I was forced to look and perceive a sight not so special and perhaps, not so intereseting. I made some other photos of this abandoned building. I don't know the reason. I just had to. It sucked me in.
My forewords are to remember this situation. The words beneath the photo I gathered today in an attempt to turn this something I feel inside out. It is definitely borne by the photo, and perhaps something I still have inside. Enjoy. Or whatever.




The smell of mould. The touch of aluminum. Cold and tough beneath the inside of his broken palm.
A cigarette might help.
A car turned around the corner down on the street. He lowered himself on the gravel. Each and every little stone in the concrete reached to his leg. Some of them felt smooth, some had shrieking edges. Too much information.
He forced the paper between his parched lips and took a long sniff. It was not lit.
Behind the curtain of my eyes a howling approaches.
Numbing illusions to minimum, screwing up perceptions to maximum. Too much.
If I could only break the bars.
Out of the cage.
His stomach shivered. The scree attained his flesh, his tendons, his bones underneath.
The lighter in his pocket. With hands shaking the let the little dancing flow of fire meet the end of the roll. A tip of flame kissed his fingers, piercing dry skin. He hardly noticed the smell of burning flesh.
Finally. Out with you all.
The flow took him up and above. Out of the cage.