afterpieces of an out-of-body experience

This Sunday (9 July), I had a wonderful experience. I took part in a meditation, where the leader guided us to meet what is supposed to be our inner and higher self. It was not an extraordinarily new idea to me that our body is not our equivalent. Also, that one has to be thankful for God (Mother Earth and higher spirit, whatever) for having received a body for the fulfillment of one's tasks is also an idea that did not struck me as brand new this afternoon.

What I want to express here is the unexpressable. My trouble is that although many of the ideas presented there and on other spiritual forums is familiar to me, I have hard times verbalizing my experiences, efforts and thoughts. Not to mention that I have a bit of hard times right now - I am trying to reflect on and explain something I find hard to vocalize in my own language, in a language not mine.

Well, it was not my very first out-of-body experience. The thing is one can not be completely sure as the thing s/he felt was a real out of body experience and that s/he really took the journey to those places. I think it's my shortsightedness or lack of experience that makes me feel this way. Had I more expriences in the field, I would able to see more clearly. There's only one way to cure it: more experiences. More relevant reading and studying.

The Sunday journey was so very much refreshing. It filled me up with energy. On my way home, I went afoot. I felt lithe and zippy and somehow out of our present day again. But this time I had a better onlook on things, than in the days of depression. I spyed things from above, from a higher level of frequency. I jumped through water puddles with an awesome grace. My leaps in the air were effortless, yet completely controlled. I felt divine.

I had to walk through a bridge. Through the river Danube, as the event took place in Budapest and I went not to my home but to my MILO's place.

I arrived to the bridge, to one of the oldest and largest of the town. It does not corss the river in a squarely fashion. As there is an island in the middle of the river, the bridge bends and is much longer as it should normally be.

I kept on my happy pace and as I looked around, watching the world as a glamorous scenery around, where I am a free soul, I found my eyesight pondering above the water. The Danube was light brown (filthy from the city) and wide. It whirled around and every here and there I saw serious drifts in the surface. My eyes were set on those abysses (the water is deep here). I felt mesmerized. I hardly could avert my eyes. And I felt falling. Theoretically.

From the fancy heights collapsed I, down to the drift. The feeling was unescapable.

I felt hopeless and down.

I had to take some time to gather myself and walk away. I did not want to jump, my friends. I felt sorry/anger/frustration because water could take my good and high mood away. Water took me off to a lower level of frequency. It had powers beyond me.

I don't understand as I never was afraid of water or of being drowned. Instead, I used to fear of being electrocuted by some electricity short-cut or a broken machine.

Did I have this feeling because I allowed water and all forms of water into my soul? I don't think so as I did not allowed it in - it was already there and I just let it out.

I have to work on it.