I walk towards home
a dark hole in some dazed obscure water
swollen crocodiles along the trail
their dead bodies sway in the grass
blue butterflies among the blades
my legs stiff, frozen and heavy
the air is oozy and as I wipe the non-existent moist from my forehead
I wipe off memories of you, too
I can't take it anymore
wake me up
for I need a lust for life
but my eyes close themselves
small and invisible
behind my eyelids, I am safe
a hideout for the misplaced-
it comforts me.
Curtains dropped, the journey begins
and each time I pray for not to
be here, be me, be, in my time again
how pathetic
I do not really wish this
being ripped off, detached hurts me even more
this is the only pain I feel
I wish I was alive instead -
the nearer I strive to Heaven the closer I get to Hell
6 megjegyzés:
"I walk towards home
a dark hole in some dazed obscure water" -
How clever... that can read as "home, a dark hole" or "I, a dark hole, walk towards home", and both ways it conveys the feeling of this gaping void, a dark emptiness. This poem is really creepy, in a good way - powerful.
"Curtains dropped, the journey begins
and each time I pray for not to
be here, be me, be, in my time again"
- I sometimes feel that way too... like somewhere something went wrong, like I'm existing in an alternate reality, where things aren't the way they were supposed to be. Does that sound terrible?
Cool!
OUch. That hurts.
Thank you for the comments. I have been gathering some strength to reply to you... I still dare not re read the lines...
But I have a much more curious, an-almost-positive attitude towards things now.
To Anniina,
I see what you mean! It did not occurred to me at first, not having a real way with English words, but that observation is so true. It really can be either way. I like that!
And yes, those alternative reality you mentioned at the end of your post does sound terrible. Been there myself, too.
To Myutopia,
I sort of glad that you found it interesting and 'cool'. I would have NOT written this, you see, if I had the chance.
To Bobealia,
it did. But I'm sort of better now. I hope.
Last line is my favorite. I just read your post to me about writing in English when it isn't your primary language. Thank you for being so detailed. I was confused by something.
Thinking shapes one's attitude towards life and when the net of thoughts just does not fit the net of actions one is to encounter on a daily basis one feels uneasy - at the very least.
What does that mean?
I see now that Anniina was not alone with her not understanding my notion, which probably came out meaningless and mixed up.
I will try to throw some light on it - later on, in the days to come.
Megjegyzés küldése